From Me To Me

Alex, 

Now that you’re home, DON’T FORGET EVERYTHING THAT JUST HAPPENED! All the healings, salvations, relationships, growth, intimacy with the Father… REMEMBER THESE THINGS! The enemy is going to try to distract you and make you feel like the race wasn’t that big of a deal and nothing really came out of it. L I E! You are a different person. You know God so much deeper right now in this moment than you ever have before. You are more prepared to fight for his kingdom and spread the Good News and make disciples right now than you have been before. BELIEVE IT! Hold on to his truth and promises like your life depends on it. It does. 

Don’t get lazy because home is easy and comfortable. When you want to watch movies and be on your phone all day, remember God’s relentless pursuit of you and go pursue people like that. Take that middle schooler out to lunch and talk to her about everything under the moon and point her to Jesus. Go find that man on the side of the road with the sign that most people don’t look twice at because it’s inconvenient, bring him his favorite meal, and sit and listen to whatever he wants to tell you, share truth about what God says about him and make sure he hears how loved, seen, and important he is to his creator. Clean the house when your parents are gone for no reason other than to show them love. BE JESUS TO PEOPLE! 

It is going to be way too easy to excuse yourself from missional living because you’re back in America and everyone seems to be doing just fine for themselves and they probably go to church sometimes. DON’T SETTLE FOR THAT! Jesus left his throne, lived and was tempted as a human, was betrayed, beaten, hung, and ROSE for us to know how much he loves us and to have the chance to accept the life and relationship with him that he wants to give us. Be his picture. Play his trailer well but tell people how much better the actual movie is. 

Don’t forget the importance of community and people who will call you out when you’re messing up. Hold on tight to the ones who want to see Jesus lifted high and constantly pour into one another. You were not meant to walk this walk alone, don’t try. You are going to feel so free and independent when you don’t have six (at the very minimum, but usually more like 20) other people in your face every which way you turn. Take time to be alone and process and get to know yourself better but please please, I am begging you, choose into community, you need them so much more than you know. 

REMEMBER WHAT GOD DID IN THOSE NINE MONTHS! All the healings and salvations that you witnessed and helped bring to fruition, he is not done with that! Just because you are in the United States and HIV/AIDS does not affect 1/4 of this country does not mean he is not going to ask you to pray for people you pass in the grocery store isle or that blind kid at the mall. DO NOT PUT GOD IN A BOX! He will bust out so hard and embarrass you in the process and you can’t be mad because you totally deserved that. He is infinitely greater and more powerful/able than you have witnessed or will ever witness. Be sensitive to the Spirit and move when he says, give him no other answer but yes. HE STILL WANTS TO USE YOU. 

When you’re not hearing him as clearly or often as you did last week, take a deep breath and know he is always working and will let you know what’s up whenever you need to hear it. And if it takes a really long time, remember the floods that come after your desert seasons. Don’t close yourself off to new ways of hearing him. He is infinitely more creative than you, be open and ready to receive in whatever form it comes in. Don’t think you can escape his call, you’re not that slick. He called out to Samuel three times before he even knew the Lord. God was relentless and finally got his attention, when this happens to you answer in the same way Samuel did: “Speak Lord, your servant hears you.” Listen hard and fast and SAY YES! 

Now that you’re back in American culture it might get really hard not to dress, talk, and act like most of them do. You don’t have to wear knee length shorts and straps wider than 4 fingers on your shoulders like you did on the race but NOBODY wins when you decide to dress like you’ve never heard the word modesty in your life. WiFi is never not available and you have unlimited data but that is not a reason to spend more time on Instagram than you do in the Word. Don’t be dumb. You are not under World Race expectations and standards but you know how fruitful it was to abide by them. You don’t have to stop. Be self disciplined, have the hard conversations even though people might not understand where you’re coming from or what you’ve just been through, don’t go back to being shy about the Gospel; IT IS VERY OUNCE OF HOPE THAT YOU HAVE AND THE SOUL REASON FOR YOUR EXISTENCE, don’t pretend God isn’t important enough share. He doesn’t have to use you but he chooses to, be grateful and take advantage of that. 

Also, if you dare to think you are in any way superior to anyone who has not gone on the race, SIT DOWN. God gave you such an amazing opportunity to know him and serve others in a different way than you could have at home. He got you there, carried you through it, taught you everything you learned, and brought every ounce of growth. Don’t try to boast in anything you experienced or accomplished or may the good Lord serve you the BIGGEST slice of humble pie in whatever flavor he chooses. 

There are so many more things I need to hold you accountable to but that’s what your journal is for. I did not spend nine months writing in that thing for you to throw it in a box as memorabilia. Thank God daily for what he did in you here but do not for a second think that this was as good as it’s going to get. He’s barely getting started with you. Love people like crazy and let them be there for you even when you feel like they can’t understand or believe a word that you’re saying. Tell all the testimonies and be so unapologetically you. You got this girl. I’m praying for you. See you in TWO MONTHS!!!